i call myself terms and conditions

because y'all keep ignoring me

@deepthoughts2

True sadness is knowing you'll never see that cute stranger again

@deepthoughts2

When a teacher grades you with an F, they just pay their respects for your stupidity.

@deepthoughts2

"What do you see in him anyway" They ask

"The person he'd be if loved" I tell them

@deepthoughts2

There is no such thing as"your truth" there is the truth and your opinion.

@deepthoughts2

How do you tell the sex of an ant?

You drop it in water. If it sinks: girl ant.

@deepthoughts2

I am not even on his option list. But he is my priority.

@deepthoughts2

Which song makes you cry?
.
.
.
.
Me: AUD201920122
👀

@deepthoughts2

If you are the most smartest person in the room then you are in the wrong room.

@deepthoughts2

My Chinese waiter thinks all white people look alike and gave my food to the wrong customer

Wait. Never mind. That wasn't my waiter.

@deepthoughts2

9 times of 10 people don’t leave because of the job. They leave because of the management.

@deepthoughts2

People: "you look so unapproachable"
Me: "and yet, here you are"

@Deepthoughts2

The way you walk is your body's accent.

@deepthoughts2

Teacher: What makes you see?
Me: My eyes, my nose and my ears.
Teacher: True for the eyes but why for your ears and nose? Me: Its to hold my glasses!🤓

@deepthoughts2

Ethiopian Girls wanna date these korean kpop dudes but ends up marrying Gojjame niggas named ጀምበሬ ባይከዳኝ

@deepthoughts2

I have a plan for my retirement that ensures I'll never go hungry.

Shoplifting.

@deepthoughts2

If fish screamed and cried when on a hook, spear, or even in a net, the rules of fishing and how they’re treated might be a lot different.

@deepthoughts2

Not everyone you lose is a loss.

@deepthoughts2

hold my hand and tell me i'm not worthless.

@deepthoughts2

When Adam was lonely God Gave him one Woman!

I Repeat one Woman.

@deepthoughts2