President Trump called me on my computer phone the other day and asked if I'd spearhead some new initiatives for him. Of course I accepted under the condition that we re-form the Military Assistance Command, Vietnam - Studies and Observation Group. And I'm in charge of it. Not sure the Vietnam bit is necessary but whatever. Here's a few changes that I'll oversee with my CAR15...

All registered democrats will have their hard drives checked(no 4th amendment violations as probable cause is inherent)

You can ask the white woman in a mixed relationship if she's okay or needs help(she's either not, or days away from not being okay).

Hispanic people get paid $12/week(hard working and just doing shit ass jobs are 2 distinct concepts. Shitty pay for low skill shit jobs)

We formally apologize to Germany for not minding our own business in both world wars.
Cont

This is peak cringe weed culture..degenerate parents smoking weed with degenerate kids.