How do you open a parachute?

I need answers quickly please.

Your dog has no idea that they’re the main reason for the walk.

*phone conversation

Friend: where you at?

Me: location is relative

Friend: dude? የት ነህ!???

Me: absolute location or relative location?

Friend: where exactly?

Me: aight, my absolute location is 9 degree North...

Friend: wtf??

Me: relative location? በየካ ክ/ከተማ; ዲያስፖራ አደባባይ; በተለምዶ መገናኛ; ልዪ ስሙ...

Friend: ለዚ እኮ ነው ሰው ሁላ ሚጠላህ....

Me:

Friend:

Breath.

A fat man was standing in front of a kindergarten

One of the teachers comes and asks him:

"Are you expecting a child?"

"No. I am a bit fat that's all"

My New Year's resolution is to stop procrastinating - in 2012, that is.

Happy new year. All Ethiopians🌻🌻🌻

Feminist chicks be like "ፈረሠኛ ለ አባወራ የተሠጠዉ ሴቶች የበታች ስለሆኑ ነዉ"

If you want me to fall for you, may I recommend ignoring me?

Now in iphone 11 the apple logo is in the middle,how iphone users are gonna take a selfie in front of a mirror?

If you are home alone and not wearing any clothes, you aren't naked, you're just wearing a house.

“The stronger the light, The darker the shadow”

The main reason it becomes “harder” to make new friends as you get older is that you get really good at spotting red flags in people you meet.

I like 25 letters of the alphabet

But I love u

How bored are you?

Me:*twerking by yene bicha weba*