Shaykh Ibn Uthaymin (رحمه الله) said:
“Celebrating birthdays or wedding anniversaries is un-Islamic, since celebrating such events is considered an innovation.”
-Ad-Durar al-Saniyyah, p. 173
“Celebrating birthdays or wedding anniversaries is un-Islamic, since celebrating such events is considered an innovation.”
-Ad-Durar al-Saniyyah, p. 173
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Forwarded from Radiance Of Knowledge | الديا المعارفة
A Mahr of Just 1 Riyal… Enough for a Marriage?
People delay marriage for high mahr…
Demands, expectations, pressure…
But Islam made it simple
Allah says:
“And give the women their dowries graciously…” (Surah An-Nisa 4:4)
✓ Mahr is a right
✓ But it is not meant to be a burden
Muhammad ibn Salih al-Uthaymeen رحمه الله mentioned a case where a marriage was done with a mahr of just 1 riyal—showing how simple and valid a nikah can be when conditions are fulfilled
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“The most blessed marriage is the one with the least burden.” (Reported in Musnad Ahmad)
And he ﷺ even allowed a man to marry by teaching Qur’an as mahr (Sahih al-Bukhari)
SubhanAllah…
• Barakah is not in high price
• It is in ease and sincerity
• Simplicity brings stability
So don’t turn marriage into a financial obstacle
Make it easy—and Allah will put barakah in it
People delay marriage for high mahr…
Demands, expectations, pressure…
But Islam made it simple
Allah says:
“And give the women their dowries graciously…” (Surah An-Nisa 4:4)
✓ Mahr is a right
✓ But it is not meant to be a burden
Muhammad ibn Salih al-Uthaymeen رحمه الله mentioned a case where a marriage was done with a mahr of just 1 riyal—showing how simple and valid a nikah can be when conditions are fulfilled
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“The most blessed marriage is the one with the least burden.” (Reported in Musnad Ahmad)
And he ﷺ even allowed a man to marry by teaching Qur’an as mahr (Sahih al-Bukhari)
SubhanAllah…
• Barakah is not in high price
• It is in ease and sincerity
• Simplicity brings stability
So don’t turn marriage into a financial obstacle
Make it easy—and Allah will put barakah in it
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Forwarded from ســفيـنة الصـابريـن
Many people often say,
“I want a righteous husband” or “a righteous wife.”
But the most important question is:
Have you fixed yourself? Or do you expect a righteous partner while you remain unchanged?
Have you strengthened your connection with Allah?
Do you pray your ṣalāh on time?
Do you have a deep connection with the Qur’an?
Begin with yourself...⚡
Refine your character. Correct your state.
The qualities you seek in a spouse… first build them within yourself.
And if you are not granted a righteous partner, it is still an honor that you became the kind of righteous person you were searching for.
“I want a righteous husband” or “a righteous wife.”
But the most important question is:
Have you fixed yourself? Or do you expect a righteous partner while you remain unchanged?
Have you strengthened your connection with Allah?
Do you pray your ṣalāh on time?
Do you have a deep connection with the Qur’an?
Begin with yourself...⚡
Refine your character. Correct your state.
The qualities you seek in a spouse… first build them within yourself.
And if you are not granted a righteous partner, it is still an honor that you became the kind of righteous person you were searching for.
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The most blessed marriage has the least burden. Normalize simple Nikahs and early marriage to make halal easy and haram hard.
Don't go broke chasing society’s approval; they won't be satisfied either way. Build your life on barakah, not a one-night show.
Don't go broke chasing society’s approval; they won't be satisfied either way. Build your life on barakah, not a one-night show.
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Ā’ishah (رضى الله عنها) said:
“A month would pass in which we would not light a fire. We had nothing except dates and water unless some meat was brought to us.”
📖 Sahīh al-Bukhārī: 6458
“A month would pass in which we would not light a fire. We had nothing except dates and water unless some meat was brought to us.”
📖 Sahīh al-Bukhārī: 6458
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11 BEST ADVICE FOR HUSBAND IN MARRIAGE
For you to have a successful marriage, you must be intentional. The way you treat your wife will determine how peaceful and sweet your home will be. Marriage is not just about being a husband in name — it is about being a loving leader, friend, and partner.
Here are 11 powerful pieces of advice for every husband:
1. Be Gentle With Her Emotions
Your wife is emotional by nature. The way you talk to her matters a lot. Harsh words, insults, and disrespect can wound her deeply. A woman may forgive, but she hardly forgets how she was treated. Choose kind, patient, and loving words. Speak to her with respect — even when you are upset.
2. Never Raise Your Hand on Her
Your wife is not a punching bag. Physical violence destroys love and trust. The day a man beats his wife is the day he starts losing her respect and emotional connection. A real man controls his anger. Strength is shown in self-control, not aggression - you can never beats a woman into submission or correction- use love as a weapon on your wife
3. Create a Peaceful Home
If you want a peaceful home, treat your wife with love. Let your children see affection, respect, and unity between their parents. The atmosphere you create in your marriage shapes your children’s future relationships. Peace in the home starts with your attitude.
4. Don’t Stop Dating Your Wife
Marriage is not the end of romance — it is the beginning. Many men stop being romantic after the wedding. Don’t make that mistake. Continue to care, compliment, surprise, and appreciate her all days or weekends.
5. Speak Well of Her in Public
Never insult or belittle your wife in front of others. Praise her openly. Celebrate her strengths. Hold her hand in the public-When you honor her publicly, you build her confidence and strengthen your bond.
6. Listen to Her
Sometimes she does not need solutions — she needs your ears. Listen without interrupting. Pay attention to her feelings. Listening makes her feel valued and understood.
7. Provide and Protect
As a husband, responsibility is important. Work hard to provide for your family within your capacity. Protect her emotionally and physically. Let her feel safe with you.
8. Apologize When You Are Wrong
Pride destroys marriages. If you make a mistake, admit it. Saying “I am sorry” does not reduce you as a man — it increases respect.
Don’t be too big to say am sorry
9. Be Faithful
Trust is the foundation of marriage. Avoid anything that can break that trust — secret relationships, emotional affairs, or inappropriate friendships. Loyalty keeps love strong.
Your wife is ten times better than anyone outside your marriage
10. Learn Her Love Language
Understand what makes her feel loved — kind words, time together, gifts, help, or affection. Love her in the way she understands best.
11. Spend Quality Time Together
Work and responsibilities are important, but don’t become too busy for your wife. Create time to talk, laugh, and connect without distractions.
Remember: A successful marriage does not happen by chance. It happens by daily choices — respect, kindness, patience, and love.
✓ A husband does not only say “I love you.”
He shows it in his actions every day. God bless us all.
#toallmgakapamilya #toallhealthadvocates #highlights2025 #_for_all_the_single_men_and_ladies #nonfollowersviewers #hilightseveryonefollowers #toallmyviewers #toallmyfbfriends #toallmyfollowers .
For you to have a successful marriage, you must be intentional. The way you treat your wife will determine how peaceful and sweet your home will be. Marriage is not just about being a husband in name — it is about being a loving leader, friend, and partner.
Here are 11 powerful pieces of advice for every husband:
1. Be Gentle With Her Emotions
Your wife is emotional by nature. The way you talk to her matters a lot. Harsh words, insults, and disrespect can wound her deeply. A woman may forgive, but she hardly forgets how she was treated. Choose kind, patient, and loving words. Speak to her with respect — even when you are upset.
2. Never Raise Your Hand on Her
Your wife is not a punching bag. Physical violence destroys love and trust. The day a man beats his wife is the day he starts losing her respect and emotional connection. A real man controls his anger. Strength is shown in self-control, not aggression - you can never beats a woman into submission or correction- use love as a weapon on your wife
3. Create a Peaceful Home
If you want a peaceful home, treat your wife with love. Let your children see affection, respect, and unity between their parents. The atmosphere you create in your marriage shapes your children’s future relationships. Peace in the home starts with your attitude.
4. Don’t Stop Dating Your Wife
Marriage is not the end of romance — it is the beginning. Many men stop being romantic after the wedding. Don’t make that mistake. Continue to care, compliment, surprise, and appreciate her all days or weekends.
5. Speak Well of Her in Public
Never insult or belittle your wife in front of others. Praise her openly. Celebrate her strengths. Hold her hand in the public-When you honor her publicly, you build her confidence and strengthen your bond.
6. Listen to Her
Sometimes she does not need solutions — she needs your ears. Listen without interrupting. Pay attention to her feelings. Listening makes her feel valued and understood.
7. Provide and Protect
As a husband, responsibility is important. Work hard to provide for your family within your capacity. Protect her emotionally and physically. Let her feel safe with you.
8. Apologize When You Are Wrong
Pride destroys marriages. If you make a mistake, admit it. Saying “I am sorry” does not reduce you as a man — it increases respect.
Don’t be too big to say am sorry
9. Be Faithful
Trust is the foundation of marriage. Avoid anything that can break that trust — secret relationships, emotional affairs, or inappropriate friendships. Loyalty keeps love strong.
Your wife is ten times better than anyone outside your marriage
10. Learn Her Love Language
Understand what makes her feel loved — kind words, time together, gifts, help, or affection. Love her in the way she understands best.
11. Spend Quality Time Together
Work and responsibilities are important, but don’t become too busy for your wife. Create time to talk, laugh, and connect without distractions.
Remember: A successful marriage does not happen by chance. It happens by daily choices — respect, kindness, patience, and love.
✓ A husband does not only say “I love you.”
He shows it in his actions every day. God bless us all.
#toallmgakapamilya #toallhealthadvocates #highlights2025 #_for_all_the_single_men_and_ladies #nonfollowersviewers #hilightseveryonefollowers #toallmyviewers #toallmyfbfriends #toallmyfollowers .
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Today's Harsh Reality 📌
At the time of zina, no one looks at your career, money, or assets—
but when it comes to Nikkah, suddenly everything is evaluated: bank balance, career, job, and status. A reflection of our misplaced priorities.
At the time of zina, no one looks at your career, money, or assets—
but when it comes to Nikkah, suddenly everything is evaluated: bank balance, career, job, and status. A reflection of our misplaced priorities.
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Your partner didn’t just marry who you are right now.
They married who you’re becoming.
That’s the silent contract in marriage. While she says “I do” to the man standing in front of her, she’s secretly betting on the stronger, wealthier, wiser, and more disciplined version of you in the future.
If you become lazy, soft, broke, emotionally weak, or lose your edge after marriage, she will slowly lose respect and eventually attraction. Many men get comfortable and wonder why their wife becomes cold or resentful years later.
Growth isn’t optional in marriage. Keep hitting the gym, stacking your money, sharpening your leadership, and protecting your frame.
Become the kind of man she would proudly follow for life.
Because the day you stop growing is the day she starts questioning her choice.
Level up relentlessly, king. Make sure the man you’re becoming is worth staying married to.
They married who you’re becoming.
That’s the silent contract in marriage. While she says “I do” to the man standing in front of her, she’s secretly betting on the stronger, wealthier, wiser, and more disciplined version of you in the future.
If you become lazy, soft, broke, emotionally weak, or lose your edge after marriage, she will slowly lose respect and eventually attraction. Many men get comfortable and wonder why their wife becomes cold or resentful years later.
Growth isn’t optional in marriage. Keep hitting the gym, stacking your money, sharpening your leadership, and protecting your frame.
Become the kind of man she would proudly follow for life.
Because the day you stop growing is the day she starts questioning her choice.
Level up relentlessly, king. Make sure the man you’re becoming is worth staying married to.
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“If your spouse doesn’t pray the 5 daily prayer, that marriage IS NOT VALID!”
Imam Ibn Al-Qayyim
Germantown Khutbah 4/24/26
Imam Ibn Al-Qayyim
Germantown Khutbah 4/24/26
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My Thoughts On Polygamy | Marriage With Divorced, Widow (Single Mother), & Reverts.
If marriages are kept simple, then society will not see having two or more marriages as a flaw. This is not a defect; rather, it is a way to prevent growing sins in society.
Because we see every day many cases where a marriage happens and within a few months the husband divorces the wife, or within a year the husband passes away.
Imagine what will happen to that girl whose husband dies within months or a year, or who is divorced. Will she spend her whole life like this? That would be zulm on her.
And if she is not remarried elsewhere, there is a fear that she may fall into sin, and the burden of that sin will be on the entire society, and everyone will be responsible.
This is a major flaw in our society that people consider second or third marriages, or marrying a widow or a divorced woman, as something wrong.
Girls who revert to Islam are often cut off by society, disowned by family, denied property, and forced to survive alone while managing everything on their own. Be patient with them do not judge them.
I request young men to make marriage common, to marry widows, divorced women, and reverts to accept them along with their children so that people do not see it as a flaw.
And I also request those women that whatever has happened forget it and move on, without placing conditions, they should accept a second marriage for the sake of their deen.
If marriages are kept simple, then society will not see having two or more marriages as a flaw. This is not a defect; rather, it is a way to prevent growing sins in society.
Because we see every day many cases where a marriage happens and within a few months the husband divorces the wife, or within a year the husband passes away.
Imagine what will happen to that girl whose husband dies within months or a year, or who is divorced. Will she spend her whole life like this? That would be zulm on her.
And if she is not remarried elsewhere, there is a fear that she may fall into sin, and the burden of that sin will be on the entire society, and everyone will be responsible.
This is a major flaw in our society that people consider second or third marriages, or marrying a widow or a divorced woman, as something wrong.
Girls who revert to Islam are often cut off by society, disowned by family, denied property, and forced to survive alone while managing everything on their own. Be patient with them do not judge them.
I request young men to make marriage common, to marry widows, divorced women, and reverts to accept them along with their children so that people do not see it as a flaw.
And I also request those women that whatever has happened forget it and move on, without placing conditions, they should accept a second marriage for the sake of their deen.
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Today, unfortunately,
many marriages are delayed because people only look for a fully settled spouse. What guidance does Islam give about this?
This mindset has made marriage difficult in many places. When people wait only for a perfectly settled spouse in terms of wealth, career, or status, many good proposals are rejected. Islam teaches that the most important qualities in a spouse are faith, good character, and responsibility, not only financial stability. The Prophet ﷺ said: “When someone whose religion and character you are pleased with comes to you, then marry him…” (Sunan al-Tirmidhi). This shows that righteousness and character should be the main criteria when choosing a spouse.
Allah also reminds believers to trust in His provision. He says: “If they are poor, Allah will enrich them from His bounty” (Qur’an 24:32). Many couples grow and become stable after marriage by supporting each other and building their lives together. When people prioritize deen and sincerity over material perfection, marriages become easier and more blessed.
O Allah, make halal marriage easy for those seeking it, grant us righteous spouses, and place love and barakah in our homes. Ameen 🤲
many marriages are delayed because people only look for a fully settled spouse. What guidance does Islam give about this?
This mindset has made marriage difficult in many places. When people wait only for a perfectly settled spouse in terms of wealth, career, or status, many good proposals are rejected. Islam teaches that the most important qualities in a spouse are faith, good character, and responsibility, not only financial stability. The Prophet ﷺ said: “When someone whose religion and character you are pleased with comes to you, then marry him…” (Sunan al-Tirmidhi). This shows that righteousness and character should be the main criteria when choosing a spouse.
Allah also reminds believers to trust in His provision. He says: “If they are poor, Allah will enrich them from His bounty” (Qur’an 24:32). Many couples grow and become stable after marriage by supporting each other and building their lives together. When people prioritize deen and sincerity over material perfection, marriages become easier and more blessed.
O Allah, make halal marriage easy for those seeking it, grant us righteous spouses, and place love and barakah in our homes. Ameen 🤲
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al-Qurṭubī said:
❝Amongst humans, the ones shayṭān most often target are women, especially during their menstruation.❞
Tafsīr al-Qurṭubī 2/283
❝Amongst humans, the ones shayṭān most often target are women, especially during their menstruation.❞
Tafsīr al-Qurṭubī 2/283
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Forwarded from Noble Spouse | Nikkah And Marriage
Marriage in Islam is a mercy, not a burden.
It is where two people learn how to give without expecting, to forgive without hesitation, and to love without condition. Every disagreement becomes a chance to practice patience, and every misunderstanding becomes an opportunity for growth. The foundation of an Islamic marriage is not ego, but humility before Allah and before each other. When spouses choose kindness over pride, their relationship becomes stronger than any hardship they face. True love is not found in perfection, but in consistent effort to please Allah together.
It is where two people learn how to give without expecting, to forgive without hesitation, and to love without condition. Every disagreement becomes a chance to practice patience, and every misunderstanding becomes an opportunity for growth. The foundation of an Islamic marriage is not ego, but humility before Allah and before each other. When spouses choose kindness over pride, their relationship becomes stronger than any hardship they face. True love is not found in perfection, but in consistent effort to please Allah together.
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Choose wisely!!
There is no perfect age for marriage. Not your twenties, not your thirties, not your forties. The right time is when the right person comes.
It is not about when you marry, it is about who you marry.
Do not let the noise of people or the pressure of time push you into a decision. If the train passes, let it pass. Because what truly matters is not when you get on but where it will take you.
Marriage is not just a moment. It is trust, responsibility, and a life shared. It is placing your values, your peace, and your future in someone else’s care.
So take your time. Choose with clarity, not emotion. Choose with purpose, not pressure.
A right choice may take time but it brings a lifetime of peace. A wise choice today saves you from regrets tomorrow.
There is no perfect age for marriage. Not your twenties, not your thirties, not your forties. The right time is when the right person comes.
It is not about when you marry, it is about who you marry.
Do not let the noise of people or the pressure of time push you into a decision. If the train passes, let it pass. Because what truly matters is not when you get on but where it will take you.
Marriage is not just a moment. It is trust, responsibility, and a life shared. It is placing your values, your peace, and your future in someone else’s care.
So take your time. Choose with clarity, not emotion. Choose with purpose, not pressure.
A right choice may take time but it brings a lifetime of peace. A wise choice today saves you from regrets tomorrow.
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'Ā` ishah (Allāh be pleased with her):
“O women, if you were to know the right of your husbands over you, one of you would wipe the dust off her husband's feet by the cheek of her face.”
● [الكبائر للذهبي ١/١٧٢]
“O women, if you were to know the right of your husbands over you, one of you would wipe the dust off her husband's feet by the cheek of her face.”
● [الكبائر للذهبي ١/١٧٢]
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MARRYING THE WRONG PERSON IS THE MOST COSTLY MISTAKE A HUMAN CAN MAKE:
1. Sign legally into a life that drains you before 8am every morning.
2. Raise children inside a tension they will spend their adult lives trying to understand.
3. Lose your identity slowly trying to make an incompatible dynamic work.
4. Stay for the kids and teach the kids that this is what love looks like.
5. Watch financial, emotional and physical health all deteriorate inside one bad decision.
6. Spend your highest earning years splitting assets you built under stress.
7. Outsource your happiness to someone who was never equipped to hold it.
8. Let the wrong partnership make you cynical about love entirely.
9. Perform a marriage publicly that is barely surviving privately.
10. Waste the years when you were most vibrant, attractive and full of potential.
11. Confuse the sunk cost of years together for a reason to stay forever.
12. Grow into completely different people and call it a surprise when it was always a slow drift.
13. Realize that the loneliest place on earth is not being alone but being with the wrong person every single day.
1. Sign legally into a life that drains you before 8am every morning.
2. Raise children inside a tension they will spend their adult lives trying to understand.
3. Lose your identity slowly trying to make an incompatible dynamic work.
4. Stay for the kids and teach the kids that this is what love looks like.
5. Watch financial, emotional and physical health all deteriorate inside one bad decision.
6. Spend your highest earning years splitting assets you built under stress.
7. Outsource your happiness to someone who was never equipped to hold it.
8. Let the wrong partnership make you cynical about love entirely.
9. Perform a marriage publicly that is barely surviving privately.
10. Waste the years when you were most vibrant, attractive and full of potential.
11. Confuse the sunk cost of years together for a reason to stay forever.
12. Grow into completely different people and call it a surprise when it was always a slow drift.
13. Realize that the loneliest place on earth is not being alone but being with the wrong person every single day.
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Most brothers speak with emotions when they meet sisters that have taste. This is an error, asking for good things in life is not a crime, brothers have tastes too. No matter your level of religiosity, there are brothers and sisters you cannot afford, so getting married to them will bring up financial tussle.
We all have levels, 'shoe get size, okrika get quality', brothers, there are some sisters you cannot marry because of the financial engagement, no matter how you see it. In life, there is social stratification. You have SSCE, and she's a Masters holder, and you want to marry her, it is not always easy to see that type of marriage. It is one out of ten.
A man once said that none of his daughters has ever used a commercial bus, bike or keke since birth, if you want to marry a lady like that and you do not have a car, she will find it difficult to cope, she is not used to it, there is difference between trekking and exercise in a manner of speaking. A sister who stays in a duplex apartment in her parents' house all through, you want to put her in one room in a local environment, it is not easy for her, my brother.
The best thing to do is to marry a sister you can afford, there are women you will give Android phone, they will go to NTA to announce it because it means a lot to them, they will jubilate, but some are already using iPhone, they will not appreciate your Android phone, not because they are bad, but they are more than what you can offer.
Each time you see sisters or brothers seeking partners and they roll out their cut off mark, it is what they want, do not get emotional about it, it is a choice. If you cannot afford them, pray for them to get what they want provided it is not against the religion. You should not be angry when people make their choices. Some brothers are of the opinion, once a sister is using hijab or niqab, she does not have the right to choose a decent living. This is wrong.
While you can marry anybody, she wants to marry somebody. What about a brother that is religious, ma sha Allah brother, who is financially bouyant and responsible, he is the dream man of most sisters. The brother wants a sister who has memorized the whole Qur'an, religious, beautiful, educated, with front and back, we all like good things.
A ma sha Allah brother once told me, 'Abu Sheikh, I want to marry older woman, they are the best, I heard, you are a match maker, please can you help get a Muslimah, she should be like 40 years old divorcee or widow, who is stinkingly rich, her name must be Khadijah, because I am 25 years old, and my name is Muhammad.' He continued, 'if you can get it for me, I will reward you handsomely.' I just smile, people and their cut off marks! Abu Sheikh
Always pay attention to details.
Abu Sheikh
We all have levels, 'shoe get size, okrika get quality', brothers, there are some sisters you cannot marry because of the financial engagement, no matter how you see it. In life, there is social stratification. You have SSCE, and she's a Masters holder, and you want to marry her, it is not always easy to see that type of marriage. It is one out of ten.
A man once said that none of his daughters has ever used a commercial bus, bike or keke since birth, if you want to marry a lady like that and you do not have a car, she will find it difficult to cope, she is not used to it, there is difference between trekking and exercise in a manner of speaking. A sister who stays in a duplex apartment in her parents' house all through, you want to put her in one room in a local environment, it is not easy for her, my brother.
The best thing to do is to marry a sister you can afford, there are women you will give Android phone, they will go to NTA to announce it because it means a lot to them, they will jubilate, but some are already using iPhone, they will not appreciate your Android phone, not because they are bad, but they are more than what you can offer.
Each time you see sisters or brothers seeking partners and they roll out their cut off mark, it is what they want, do not get emotional about it, it is a choice. If you cannot afford them, pray for them to get what they want provided it is not against the religion. You should not be angry when people make their choices. Some brothers are of the opinion, once a sister is using hijab or niqab, she does not have the right to choose a decent living. This is wrong.
While you can marry anybody, she wants to marry somebody. What about a brother that is religious, ma sha Allah brother, who is financially bouyant and responsible, he is the dream man of most sisters. The brother wants a sister who has memorized the whole Qur'an, religious, beautiful, educated, with front and back, we all like good things.
A ma sha Allah brother once told me, 'Abu Sheikh, I want to marry older woman, they are the best, I heard, you are a match maker, please can you help get a Muslimah, she should be like 40 years old divorcee or widow, who is stinkingly rich, her name must be Khadijah, because I am 25 years old, and my name is Muhammad.' He continued, 'if you can get it for me, I will reward you handsomely.' I just smile, people and their cut off marks! Abu Sheikh
Always pay attention to details.
Abu Sheikh
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THE WIFE WHO IS UNGRATEFUL TO HER HUSBAND
Ibn Mas'ūd (رضي الله عنه) said:
"The Prophet (ﷺ) spoke to us, and he said, 'Give charity, O women; for indeed, you are the largest amount of people in the fire on the Day of Judgment.' A woman stood up who was not from the upper class of women, and she said, 'O Messenger of Allāh, why are we the largest amount of the people of the fire?' He said, 'Because you curse [people] much and are ungrateful toward your husbands.'"
[Collected by Al-Bukhāri (#304), Muslim (#79)]
The meaning of this is that she denies the good in her husband due to a stance that he takes that she does not like. She says, "I have never seen any good from you." "You never did anything for me." "You do not take care of my needs." This type of speech and behavior is a form of denying blessings, which weighs on his soul, especially if she behaves this way in abundance, denying the good in him.
Book: Divorce Its Reasons and Its Cures
By Shaykh Abū Furayhān Jamāl Ibn Furayhān al-Hārithī
Translated by Jamil Finch
Hikmah Publications
P. 34
Ibn Mas'ūd (رضي الله عنه) said:
"The Prophet (ﷺ) spoke to us, and he said, 'Give charity, O women; for indeed, you are the largest amount of people in the fire on the Day of Judgment.' A woman stood up who was not from the upper class of women, and she said, 'O Messenger of Allāh, why are we the largest amount of the people of the fire?' He said, 'Because you curse [people] much and are ungrateful toward your husbands.'"
[Collected by Al-Bukhāri (#304), Muslim (#79)]
The meaning of this is that she denies the good in her husband due to a stance that he takes that she does not like. She says, "I have never seen any good from you." "You never did anything for me." "You do not take care of my needs." This type of speech and behavior is a form of denying blessings, which weighs on his soul, especially if she behaves this way in abundance, denying the good in him.
Book: Divorce Its Reasons and Its Cures
By Shaykh Abū Furayhān Jamāl Ibn Furayhān al-Hārithī
Translated by Jamil Finch
Hikmah Publications
P. 34
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YOUR PARENTS...
The great Imaam, Muhammad bin al-Munkadir (d.130AH) رحمه الله said:
"My brother 'Umar spent the night in prayer (i.e. the tahajjud Salah) and I spent the night massaging my mother's feet, and I would NOT exchange my night with his night."
[Siyar 'Alaam an-Nubala 5/359]
An advice especially to our young, who are still living at home and not married. Make the most of your time with your parents, in being good to them and being at their service. When you start working, get married and have children إن شاء الله, you won't have the same opportunity and free time as you used to.
@MarkazMuaadh
The great Imaam, Muhammad bin al-Munkadir (d.130AH) رحمه الله said:
"My brother 'Umar spent the night in prayer (i.e. the tahajjud Salah) and I spent the night massaging my mother's feet, and I would NOT exchange my night with his night."
[Siyar 'Alaam an-Nubala 5/359]
An advice especially to our young, who are still living at home and not married. Make the most of your time with your parents, in being good to them and being at their service. When you start working, get married and have children إن شاء الله, you won't have the same opportunity and free time as you used to.
@MarkazMuaadh
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From a brother
1. ➡️You see I want to advise some of our sisters especially those of them who are 30 years plus, (between 30 to 35) who normally include *NO TO POLYGYNY* in their profile.
2. ➡️The question we need to ask ourselves is, how many single brothers at 30 plus will consider a lady of 30 plus as wife? A lot of brothers are looking for sisters between 22-29 years, and you cannot blame them. They have their valid reasons!
3. ➡️I think I'm in the best position to give this advice because I am 45 years, planning to pick a second wife, insha'Allah. But I myself does not want to consider any sister of more than 31, maximum!
4. ➡️As I'm talking to you, I have some responsible friends who are even planning to pick a second wife but it may amaze you that none of them is actually considering a lady of 30 years plus. They are all looking for younger sisters between 22-29...
5. ➡️So when some of our older sisters (between 31-36 years) are not facing the reality by saying NO TO POLYGYNY in their profile, I feel they are making their chances of getting married faster difficult the more, and this breaks my heart.
6. ➡️Some of them will even be saying they don't want married men o, that they want widowers. How many widowers are out there? Have they forgotten that more men die than women? Or which man will now kill his wife to become a widower?
7. ➡️Another issue they must not forget is that, nowadays, menopause sets in faster. I was surprised when a medical doctor told me that menopause could set in at 36, 37 up to 40s in some ladies. Should this not break one's heart? If our sisters know this, why are they now setting some of the unrealistic conditions?
8. ➡️ Please, I should not be misquoted, I'm not saying our sisters should not go for their choices. All I'm saying is that if they know that age is no longer on their side, it makes sense to reduce the requirements to the realistic ones. So that, they should not be the ones working against their prayers.
9. ➡️Lastly, my advice to them is to carefully open their chances wide through their requirements. If I put myself in the shoes of any of our sisters of 30 years and above, my conditions will be: (i) any Muslim brother of 30 and above who is CARING, LOVING and RESPONSIBLE (ii) whether MARRIED or SINGLE FATHER or WIDOWER does not matter, as long as the man is capable, he is welcome! (iii) include it too that you're ready to be supportive - (The truth is that no man wants liability)!
10. ➡️I decided to contact you today so that you can be advising them based on the reality out there. Let them not get angry against this my message. I feel for them all and I want the best for them but let them face the reality! That's what I'm saying.
May Allah answer the prayers of our sisters in these categories aameen
1. ➡️You see I want to advise some of our sisters especially those of them who are 30 years plus, (between 30 to 35) who normally include *NO TO POLYGYNY* in their profile.
2. ➡️The question we need to ask ourselves is, how many single brothers at 30 plus will consider a lady of 30 plus as wife? A lot of brothers are looking for sisters between 22-29 years, and you cannot blame them. They have their valid reasons!
3. ➡️I think I'm in the best position to give this advice because I am 45 years, planning to pick a second wife, insha'Allah. But I myself does not want to consider any sister of more than 31, maximum!
4. ➡️As I'm talking to you, I have some responsible friends who are even planning to pick a second wife but it may amaze you that none of them is actually considering a lady of 30 years plus. They are all looking for younger sisters between 22-29...
5. ➡️So when some of our older sisters (between 31-36 years) are not facing the reality by saying NO TO POLYGYNY in their profile, I feel they are making their chances of getting married faster difficult the more, and this breaks my heart.
6. ➡️Some of them will even be saying they don't want married men o, that they want widowers. How many widowers are out there? Have they forgotten that more men die than women? Or which man will now kill his wife to become a widower?
7. ➡️Another issue they must not forget is that, nowadays, menopause sets in faster. I was surprised when a medical doctor told me that menopause could set in at 36, 37 up to 40s in some ladies. Should this not break one's heart? If our sisters know this, why are they now setting some of the unrealistic conditions?
8. ➡️ Please, I should not be misquoted, I'm not saying our sisters should not go for their choices. All I'm saying is that if they know that age is no longer on their side, it makes sense to reduce the requirements to the realistic ones. So that, they should not be the ones working against their prayers.
9. ➡️Lastly, my advice to them is to carefully open their chances wide through their requirements. If I put myself in the shoes of any of our sisters of 30 years and above, my conditions will be: (i) any Muslim brother of 30 and above who is CARING, LOVING and RESPONSIBLE (ii) whether MARRIED or SINGLE FATHER or WIDOWER does not matter, as long as the man is capable, he is welcome! (iii) include it too that you're ready to be supportive - (The truth is that no man wants liability)!
10. ➡️I decided to contact you today so that you can be advising them based on the reality out there. Let them not get angry against this my message. I feel for them all and I want the best for them but let them face the reality! That's what I'm saying.
May Allah answer the prayers of our sisters in these categories aameen
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