I’m so tired of seeing women act like they have the right to dictate polygyny to their husbands. “He needs my permission.” “If he marries another, I’ll make him divorce her.”
Like… who do you think you are? You think you’re above Mother Ḥafṣah عليها السلام?
Read Sūrah al-Taḥrīm. The Prophet ﷺ had a concubine, Māriyah al-Qibṭiyyah, who was ḥalāl for him. When he spent time with her and Ḥafṣah got upset, he tried to please her and said he’d avoid Māriyah. And what did Allāh say?
“O Prophet, why do you prohibit what Allāh has made lawful for you, seeking to please your wives?”
(Sūrah al-Taḥrīm 66:1 — Qur’ān)
Allāh reprimanded the Prophet ﷺ for that. Let that sink in. Ḥafṣah عليها السلام was one of the best women to ever walk this earth — and even she didn’t get what she wanted. So what exactly makes you feel so entitled?
Let’s not forget Sūrah al-Aḥzāb, when Allāh commanded the Prophet ﷺ to give his wives the choice:
Stay with him and accept the life of the hereafter, or go.
The first wife he went to was ʿĀ’ishah عليها السلام. And what did she do? She told the Prophet ﷺ not to tell the others what her choice was — because she was hoping they’d think she chose to leave, so they’d leave too.
Even the Prophet ﷺ — who loved ʿĀ’ishah more than anyone — still told the truth when the other wives asked. He didn’t lie for her. He didn’t hide it. He didn’t mistreat his other wives just to make her happy.
These were the best women. If anyone had the right to demand anything, it was them. And still, they didn’t get to control the Prophet ﷺ or override divine law. So again — what makes you think you’re so deserving of control?
Your emotions do not override Allāh’s legislation. Your hurt doesn’t rewrite the Qur’ān. Your marriage is not above the Sunnah.
So either submit to what Allāh has revealed or don’t — but stop acting like Islam revolves around your feelings. It doesn’t.
Like… who do you think you are? You think you’re above Mother Ḥafṣah عليها السلام?
Read Sūrah al-Taḥrīm. The Prophet ﷺ had a concubine, Māriyah al-Qibṭiyyah, who was ḥalāl for him. When he spent time with her and Ḥafṣah got upset, he tried to please her and said he’d avoid Māriyah. And what did Allāh say?
“O Prophet, why do you prohibit what Allāh has made lawful for you, seeking to please your wives?”
(Sūrah al-Taḥrīm 66:1 — Qur’ān)
Allāh reprimanded the Prophet ﷺ for that. Let that sink in. Ḥafṣah عليها السلام was one of the best women to ever walk this earth — and even she didn’t get what she wanted. So what exactly makes you feel so entitled?
Let’s not forget Sūrah al-Aḥzāb, when Allāh commanded the Prophet ﷺ to give his wives the choice:
Stay with him and accept the life of the hereafter, or go.
The first wife he went to was ʿĀ’ishah عليها السلام. And what did she do? She told the Prophet ﷺ not to tell the others what her choice was — because she was hoping they’d think she chose to leave, so they’d leave too.
Even the Prophet ﷺ — who loved ʿĀ’ishah more than anyone — still told the truth when the other wives asked. He didn’t lie for her. He didn’t hide it. He didn’t mistreat his other wives just to make her happy.
These were the best women. If anyone had the right to demand anything, it was them. And still, they didn’t get to control the Prophet ﷺ or override divine law. So again — what makes you think you’re so deserving of control?
Your emotions do not override Allāh’s legislation. Your hurt doesn’t rewrite the Qur’ān. Your marriage is not above the Sunnah.
So either submit to what Allāh has revealed or don’t — but stop acting like Islam revolves around your feelings. It doesn’t.
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Don't Marry This Woman:
"And if all people disbelieve in a man who marries a thief, an adulteress, or a woman who drinks alcohol, or the like, then their disbelieve in marrying a woman who doesn't pray is even greater.
And the greatest consensus of the people is that a woman who doesn't pray is worse than an adulteress, a thief, or a woman who drinks alcohol."
Shaykh Ibn Taymiyyah
"And if all people disbelieve in a man who marries a thief, an adulteress, or a woman who drinks alcohol, or the like, then their disbelieve in marrying a woman who doesn't pray is even greater.
And the greatest consensus of the people is that a woman who doesn't pray is worse than an adulteress, a thief, or a woman who drinks alcohol."
Shaykh Ibn Taymiyyah
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Most marriages don't end over betrayal. They erode in small moments, both people angry at once, and neither willing to be the one who softens first. The Salaf understood this danger, and one Companion built his whole marriage around avoiding it.
Abū'd-Dardā' (رضي الله عنه) gave his wife Umm'd-Dardā' a single rule to live by:
«إذا غضبتُ فرضِّيني، وإذا غضبتِ رضَّيتُكِ، فإذا لم نكن هكذا ما أسرعَ ما نفترق»
"If I become angry, then win me back. And if you become angry, I will win you back. For if we are not like this, how quickly we would part."
Notice it runs both ways. He doesn't wait for her to repair things. He commits to being the one who mends it, and asks the same of her. Anger met with anger has only one ending.
Someone has to choose to fix it. Every time.
Ibn Ḥibbān in Rawḍat al-ʿUqalāʾ
Abū'd-Dardā' (رضي الله عنه) gave his wife Umm'd-Dardā' a single rule to live by:
«إذا غضبتُ فرضِّيني، وإذا غضبتِ رضَّيتُكِ، فإذا لم نكن هكذا ما أسرعَ ما نفترق»
"If I become angry, then win me back. And if you become angry, I will win you back. For if we are not like this, how quickly we would part."
Notice it runs both ways. He doesn't wait for her to repair things. He commits to being the one who mends it, and asks the same of her. Anger met with anger has only one ending.
Someone has to choose to fix it. Every time.
Ibn Ḥibbān in Rawḍat al-ʿUqalāʾ
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Marriage today is not the same marriage your grandfather had.
Back then, women built with men through thick and thin.
Today, many women see men as a lifestyle upgrade, not a partner.
If you fail, she leaves.
If you succeed, she takes credit. Know the game before you play it.
Back then, women built with men through thick and thin.
Today, many women see men as a lifestyle upgrade, not a partner.
If you fail, she leaves.
If you succeed, she takes credit. Know the game before you play it.
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Ibn al-Qayyim explained that happiness can be understood in three levels.
The first is worldly happiness — the happiness that comes from wealth, status, power, beauty, or material possessions. Although people often strive greatly for these things, this type of happiness is temporary and unstable. It may disappear overnight through loss, illness, or changing circumstances.
Allah says in The Quran:
“Know that the life of this world is only play, amusement, adornment, boasting among yourselves, and competition in wealth and children…”
(Surah Al-Hadid 57:20)
The second type is physical happiness — the happiness connected to health, strength, comfort, and emotional well-being. This is a greater blessing than material wealth, yet it too is temporary, because the human body weakens with time, sickness, and hardship.
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“There are two blessings which many people waste: health and free time.”
Recorded in Sahih al-Bukhari.
The third and highest form is the happiness of the heart and soul. This is true happiness, which comes through faith, beneficial knowledge, good character, remembrance of Allah, and contentment with His decree. This happiness remains with a believer even during trials and difficulties because it is rooted in closeness to Allah.
Allah says:
“Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.”
(Surah Ar-Ra‘d 13:28)
And Allah also says:
“Whoever does righteous deeds, whether male or female, while being a believer — We will surely grant them a good life…”
(Surah An-Nahl 16:97)
Ibn al-Qayyim reflected upon the verse:
“Say: In the bounty of Allah and in His mercy — in that let them rejoice. It is better than all that they accumulate.”
(Surah Yunus 10:58)
He explained that the “Bounty of Allah” refers to faith and guidance, while His “Mercy” refers to the The Quran. Thus, the greatest joy of a believer is not found in worldly possessions, but in iman, guidance, and closeness to Allah.
And Allah knows best.
The first is worldly happiness — the happiness that comes from wealth, status, power, beauty, or material possessions. Although people often strive greatly for these things, this type of happiness is temporary and unstable. It may disappear overnight through loss, illness, or changing circumstances.
Allah says in The Quran:
“Know that the life of this world is only play, amusement, adornment, boasting among yourselves, and competition in wealth and children…”
(Surah Al-Hadid 57:20)
The second type is physical happiness — the happiness connected to health, strength, comfort, and emotional well-being. This is a greater blessing than material wealth, yet it too is temporary, because the human body weakens with time, sickness, and hardship.
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“There are two blessings which many people waste: health and free time.”
Recorded in Sahih al-Bukhari.
The third and highest form is the happiness of the heart and soul. This is true happiness, which comes through faith, beneficial knowledge, good character, remembrance of Allah, and contentment with His decree. This happiness remains with a believer even during trials and difficulties because it is rooted in closeness to Allah.
Allah says:
“Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.”
(Surah Ar-Ra‘d 13:28)
And Allah also says:
“Whoever does righteous deeds, whether male or female, while being a believer — We will surely grant them a good life…”
(Surah An-Nahl 16:97)
Ibn al-Qayyim reflected upon the verse:
“Say: In the bounty of Allah and in His mercy — in that let them rejoice. It is better than all that they accumulate.”
(Surah Yunus 10:58)
He explained that the “Bounty of Allah” refers to faith and guidance, while His “Mercy” refers to the The Quran. Thus, the greatest joy of a believer is not found in worldly possessions, but in iman, guidance, and closeness to Allah.
And Allah knows best.
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A sister once told me that women generally hate polygyny, and I laughed it out. If you believe this, then it means you can believe anything. It is unfortunate that most women do not understand the wisdom behind polygyny until they become divorced or widowed.
Women do not hate polygyny, far from it, what they hate is to share when they are at the advantage status. For instance, if she is the first wife, she hates polygyny, but when she becomes a second wife, she likes polygyny.
You also need to know that most women do not complain about polygyny when money, fame and affluence are involved, most of the noise usually comes from the poor family. Women practically clamour for polygyny when it favours them.
If her mother, aunt, sister etc are benefiting from polygyny, she likes it, but when her husband is planning to marry a second wife, there will be war. When a woman is condemning polygyny, before you react, try to know her position or status, you will know where she is coming from.
It is either she is single, or her parents failed in polygyny or she is the first wife who refuses to share with other women. A woman is ready to destroy a fellow woman when she is in a position to do so. Ask any woman going into polygyny, her utmost fear is about the drama with the co-wife.
You can imagine a sister who has a good husband, physically and financially capable to marry a second wife, the large percentage of wives will never prefer their best friends to be their co-wives, they wish such juicy positions for strangers or enemies.
When the man finally marries a second wife, one or both of them begin to manipulate, gaslight or frustrate the process, they are at a mission to chase themselves out of the marriage, "if you do not leave in peace, then I will make it tough for you.'
Sometimes, it seems women are enemies of themselves, they are best of friends until polygyny is mentioned, they quickly rush to be enemies, with negative attitudes, jealousy and manipulation, in order to make the life of the other woman miserable.
Abu Sheikh
Women do not hate polygyny, far from it, what they hate is to share when they are at the advantage status. For instance, if she is the first wife, she hates polygyny, but when she becomes a second wife, she likes polygyny.
You also need to know that most women do not complain about polygyny when money, fame and affluence are involved, most of the noise usually comes from the poor family. Women practically clamour for polygyny when it favours them.
If her mother, aunt, sister etc are benefiting from polygyny, she likes it, but when her husband is planning to marry a second wife, there will be war. When a woman is condemning polygyny, before you react, try to know her position or status, you will know where she is coming from.
It is either she is single, or her parents failed in polygyny or she is the first wife who refuses to share with other women. A woman is ready to destroy a fellow woman when she is in a position to do so. Ask any woman going into polygyny, her utmost fear is about the drama with the co-wife.
You can imagine a sister who has a good husband, physically and financially capable to marry a second wife, the large percentage of wives will never prefer their best friends to be their co-wives, they wish such juicy positions for strangers or enemies.
When the man finally marries a second wife, one or both of them begin to manipulate, gaslight or frustrate the process, they are at a mission to chase themselves out of the marriage, "if you do not leave in peace, then I will make it tough for you.'
Sometimes, it seems women are enemies of themselves, they are best of friends until polygyny is mentioned, they quickly rush to be enemies, with negative attitudes, jealousy and manipulation, in order to make the life of the other woman miserable.
Abu Sheikh
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In today’s times, nikah is often delayed until “success” arrives, while society silently normalizes what is haram. This imbalance needs reflection nikah was meant to protect faith, dignity, and character, not to be postponed by unrealistic expectations.
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*“Some Men, Some Men Are Just Different”* 💔
_From a heartbreaking daughter_
This evening I was making tea and my hand got burnt....!!
Tears came to my eyes.
My Pappa saw it and instantly grabbed my hand. He looked like he was in pain himself. He pushed the teacup aside with his other hand and immediately went to get ointment....!!
Now he’s applying the ointment on my hand, and giving Mummy a lecture at the same time....!!
“Why do you keep sending her to the kitchen? I’ve told you a thousand times, don’t make her do any work....!!”
Mummy just sat there, stunned. My hand was the one burnt, but I could see the hurt in her eyes....!!
She said, very quietly:
“I don’t send her happily. But tomorrow she has to get married. What will people say ‘the mother taught her nothing’....!!”
She was explaining herself in that sad, tired voice....!!
My Pappa said, straight away, “Let people say whatever they want. She’s not going into the kitchen now.” And he hugged me, and even warned Mummy....!!
I should’ve felt happy. But I didn’t....!!
I just kept looking at Mummy’s hands. Her thumbs are all marked from cutting vegetables. Her hands have burnt so many times there are black, scar like marks all over....!!
In fact, just last week she got such a big cut on her index finger from the knife. There was a lot of blood. But she didn’t even bandage it. She just said, “It’s fine, it’s fine....!!”
But nothing was fine at all....!!
I wanted to tell my Pappa....!!
That she’s someone’s daughter too. So what if her father isn’t alive anymore? Her husband is Alhamdulillah, very much alive....!!
You can’t bear to see your daughter’s tiny burn, but what about your wife’s pain...??
Who will she tell...??
Who will feel it for her...??
Isn’t she someone’s daughter too...??
If only....!!
If all the men in this world were as sensitive with their wives as they are with their mothers, sisters, and daughters then so many women would truly come alive.
Garments For Each Other ©
_From a heartbreaking daughter_
This evening I was making tea and my hand got burnt....!!
Tears came to my eyes.
My Pappa saw it and instantly grabbed my hand. He looked like he was in pain himself. He pushed the teacup aside with his other hand and immediately went to get ointment....!!
Now he’s applying the ointment on my hand, and giving Mummy a lecture at the same time....!!
“Why do you keep sending her to the kitchen? I’ve told you a thousand times, don’t make her do any work....!!”
Mummy just sat there, stunned. My hand was the one burnt, but I could see the hurt in her eyes....!!
She said, very quietly:
“I don’t send her happily. But tomorrow she has to get married. What will people say ‘the mother taught her nothing’....!!”
She was explaining herself in that sad, tired voice....!!
My Pappa said, straight away, “Let people say whatever they want. She’s not going into the kitchen now.” And he hugged me, and even warned Mummy....!!
I should’ve felt happy. But I didn’t....!!
I just kept looking at Mummy’s hands. Her thumbs are all marked from cutting vegetables. Her hands have burnt so many times there are black, scar like marks all over....!!
In fact, just last week she got such a big cut on her index finger from the knife. There was a lot of blood. But she didn’t even bandage it. She just said, “It’s fine, it’s fine....!!”
But nothing was fine at all....!!
I wanted to tell my Pappa....!!
That she’s someone’s daughter too. So what if her father isn’t alive anymore? Her husband is Alhamdulillah, very much alive....!!
You can’t bear to see your daughter’s tiny burn, but what about your wife’s pain...??
Who will she tell...??
Who will feel it for her...??
Isn’t she someone’s daughter too...??
If only....!!
If all the men in this world were as sensitive with their wives as they are with their mothers, sisters, and daughters then so many women would truly come alive.
Garments For Each Other ©
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Why is Adultery Worse in the Case of Women?
Ibn Al-Qayyim rahimahullah states:
«الزِنى من المرأة أقبحُ منه بالرجل، لأنها تزيد على هتكِ حقِّ الله: إفسادَ فراشِ بعلها، وتعليقَ نسبٍ من غيره عليه، وفضيحةَ أهلها وأقاربها، والجناية على محض حق الزوج، وخيانته فيه، وإسقاط حرمته عند الناس، وتعييره بإمساك البغى، وغير ذلك من مفاسد زناها».
“Adultery is more repulsive in the case of a woman compared to a man, because she doesn't just violate the right of Allāh, she exceeds that by: contaminating her husband’s bed, tying someone else’s lineage to him, dishonouring her family and relatives, violating her husband’s right and betraying him as it relates to that, disgracing his reputation with the people, causing him to be shamed for staying married to an adultress, and other evils which arise due to her (committing) adultery.”
[Zaad Al-Ma’ād (5/377)]
-Hauwa Abdulrahman
Ibn Al-Qayyim rahimahullah states:
«الزِنى من المرأة أقبحُ منه بالرجل، لأنها تزيد على هتكِ حقِّ الله: إفسادَ فراشِ بعلها، وتعليقَ نسبٍ من غيره عليه، وفضيحةَ أهلها وأقاربها، والجناية على محض حق الزوج، وخيانته فيه، وإسقاط حرمته عند الناس، وتعييره بإمساك البغى، وغير ذلك من مفاسد زناها».
“Adultery is more repulsive in the case of a woman compared to a man, because she doesn't just violate the right of Allāh, she exceeds that by: contaminating her husband’s bed, tying someone else’s lineage to him, dishonouring her family and relatives, violating her husband’s right and betraying him as it relates to that, disgracing his reputation with the people, causing him to be shamed for staying married to an adultress, and other evils which arise due to her (committing) adultery.”
[Zaad Al-Ma’ād (5/377)]
-Hauwa Abdulrahman
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Sufyan bin Uyaynah said:
"Whoever seeks honor (due to marriage) may be tested with humiliation, whoever seeks wealth may be tested with poverty, but whoever seeks religion, Allah will gather for him honor, wealth, and religion altogether."
(Hilya tul Auliya 7/289 )
"Whoever seeks honor (due to marriage) may be tested with humiliation, whoever seeks wealth may be tested with poverty, but whoever seeks religion, Allah will gather for him honor, wealth, and religion altogether."
(Hilya tul Auliya 7/289 )
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From a sister
Women never love themselves even without polygyny.
There's too much envy and jealousy in their heart.
A woman will hate another because she's more beautiful.
A woman will hate another because she's successful.
A woman will hate another if she sees her husband caring for her genuinely, take mum in law for example.
And the list is endless
Women never love themselves even without polygyny.
There's too much envy and jealousy in their heart.
A woman will hate another because she's more beautiful.
A woman will hate another because she's successful.
A woman will hate another if she sees her husband caring for her genuinely, take mum in law for example.
And the list is endless
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It is narrated that Shu'ayb ibn Harb wanted to marry a woman.
He said to her:
I have a short temper (quick to anger)
She replied: The one with worse character is the person who forces you to have short temper.
He said: Then you are my wife
Note: She acknowledged that a bad temper is often a reaction to provocations or lack of understanding from partner or an external stress
She meant I don't do things to trigger your short temperment
He said to her:
I have a short temper (quick to anger)
She replied: The one with worse character is the person who forces you to have short temper.
He said: Then you are my wife
Note: She acknowledged that a bad temper is often a reaction to provocations or lack of understanding from partner or an external stress
She meant I don't do things to trigger your short temperment
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Forwarded from Authentic Du’a & Supplications
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Do you have a grudge, worldly dispute, enmity, or trial involving someone? Do you wish to resolve it? Do you want that person to love you?
Then seek Allah’s forgiveness for them and make duʿāʾ for them in their absence.
— Shaykh ʿAbdus-Salām al-Shuwayʿir حفظه الله
https://www.linktr.ee/SalafiPosts
A Reminder Benefits the Believers.
Then seek Allah’s forgiveness for them and make duʿāʾ for them in their absence.
— Shaykh ʿAbdus-Salām al-Shuwayʿir حفظه الله
https://www.linktr.ee/SalafiPosts
A Reminder Benefits the Believers.
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Many Muslim marriages collapse today because people are entering marriage with culture, emotions, trauma, pride, and social media expectations — but not enough Qur’an, Sunnah, patience, mercy, and fear of Allah.
Marriage in Islam is not just “love.” It is عبادَة (worship), responsibility, sacrifice, loyalty, mercy, forgiveness, and teamwork through hardship. Allah says He placed between spouses love and mercy, but many people today are nurturing ego instead of mercy.
Too many couples:
• expose their marriages online
• compare their lives to social media
• lack proper Islamic knowledge before marriage
• enter relationships while spiritually damaged
• abandon communication and patience
• refuse accountability
• choose desires over deen
A successful Muslim marriage cannot survive without:
🤍 Salah
🤍 Respect
🤍 Sabr
🤍 Good character
🤍 Lowering the ego
🤍 Fear of Allah in private and public
The Prophet ﷺ said: “The best of you are those who are best to their wives.”
And sadly many people want the rights of marriage while neglecting the duties that come with it. A home without remembrance of Allah becomes heavy very quickly.
May Allah protect our marriages, soften our hearts, grant us righteous spouses upon Qur’an and Sunnah, and place barakah, mercy, and tranquility in our homes. Ameen. 🌸
Marriage in Islam is not just “love.” It is عبادَة (worship), responsibility, sacrifice, loyalty, mercy, forgiveness, and teamwork through hardship. Allah says He placed between spouses love and mercy, but many people today are nurturing ego instead of mercy.
Too many couples:
• expose their marriages online
• compare their lives to social media
• lack proper Islamic knowledge before marriage
• enter relationships while spiritually damaged
• abandon communication and patience
• refuse accountability
• choose desires over deen
A successful Muslim marriage cannot survive without:
🤍 Salah
🤍 Respect
🤍 Sabr
🤍 Good character
🤍 Lowering the ego
🤍 Fear of Allah in private and public
The Prophet ﷺ said: “The best of you are those who are best to their wives.”
And sadly many people want the rights of marriage while neglecting the duties that come with it. A home without remembrance of Allah becomes heavy very quickly.
May Allah protect our marriages, soften our hearts, grant us righteous spouses upon Qur’an and Sunnah, and place barakah, mercy, and tranquility in our homes. Ameen. 🌸
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Marry only if you are ready to face challenges together, only if you are ready to accept each other's pros & cons, only if you can focus more on positives than negatives, only if U can give & accept love. Remember, There is no marriage which doesn't face challenges, highs & lows.
Marriage is not easy. It can be difficult. It can also be amazing and beautiful. Your partner is not perfect. Neither are you. So why demand perfection? The grass is not always greener on the other side. Today, let us pray for all those marriages which are causing heartache and may Allah protect, bless and guide us all. Ameen.
Marriage is not easy. It can be difficult. It can also be amazing and beautiful. Your partner is not perfect. Neither are you. So why demand perfection? The grass is not always greener on the other side. Today, let us pray for all those marriages which are causing heartache and may Allah protect, bless and guide us all. Ameen.
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