Forwarded from Muslim Marriage Tips
A major reason why many young boys never grow up is because their mothers refuse to let them grow up. They continue to spoil him, baby him, and treat him as a little boy well into his twenties.
Treating a young man as a small child is detrimental to his development. It will stunt his growth and stop him from reaching his full potential.
If you want your sons to become the kind of men that lead society, benefit humanity, and support their own families, then you need to let go, get out of their way, and give them space to grow into real men.
Treating a young man as a small child is detrimental to his development. It will stunt his growth and stop him from reaching his full potential.
If you want your sons to become the kind of men that lead society, benefit humanity, and support their own families, then you need to let go, get out of their way, and give them space to grow into real men.
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The modern Muslim woman:
She demands all her rights while seeking to shed all her responsibilities. She believes in financial support, yet argues over obedience. She cites verses concerning the dowry and bridal gift while overlooking modesty and the tranquility of the home.
She takes from religion whatever agrees with her desires and abandons whatever restricts them.
That is worship according to desire, not devotion to Islamic law
https://t.me/MuslimMarriageTips
She demands all her rights while seeking to shed all her responsibilities. She believes in financial support, yet argues over obedience. She cites verses concerning the dowry and bridal gift while overlooking modesty and the tranquility of the home.
She takes from religion whatever agrees with her desires and abandons whatever restricts them.
That is worship according to desire, not devotion to Islamic law
https://t.me/MuslimMarriageTips
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Muslim Marriage Tips
Most successful couples,r thse,who don’t live according to d expectations of others.Thy don’t look around&try to copy others, instead, thy look towards1 another&start this journey of marriage with trust in Allaah&eachOther.
muslimmarriagetips77@gmail.com
muslimmarriagetips77@gmail.com
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If your husband is broke and struggling to meet up with his financial responsibilities in the home front, and you wish to assist him, are you expecting the reward for giving him helping hand from the Creator or your husband?
When the assistance comes with conditions, let him know. Something like; 'If I help you financially, you must not marry a second wife in future even you are physically and financially comfortable." That will definitely explain your reason for helping him.
A man without the means to cater for one wife must not go into polygyny, except he wants to face the punishment in this world and hereafter because there are consequences for not being fair in his dealings, plural marriage is not for fashion or pride, it is ibadah.
My sister, it is not your duty to spend in marriage, that is the sole responsibility of the man, but when you choose to help, the reward for your financial assistance and support to your husband should come from Allah, because human being can disappoint and betray, Allah will not.
Always pay attention to details.
Abu Sheikh
When the assistance comes with conditions, let him know. Something like; 'If I help you financially, you must not marry a second wife in future even you are physically and financially comfortable." That will definitely explain your reason for helping him.
A man without the means to cater for one wife must not go into polygyny, except he wants to face the punishment in this world and hereafter because there are consequences for not being fair in his dealings, plural marriage is not for fashion or pride, it is ibadah.
My sister, it is not your duty to spend in marriage, that is the sole responsibility of the man, but when you choose to help, the reward for your financial assistance and support to your husband should come from Allah, because human being can disappoint and betray, Allah will not.
Always pay attention to details.
Abu Sheikh
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The story of a young Man who had a habit of looking at women
This young man asked Sheik : I feel guilty about myself for a bad habit i am unable to get rid off !
I can’t stop myself from looking at girls in the market, what should I do?
Sheikh gave him a glass full of milk which was filled upto its edges and asked one of his student to accompany him to the market.
He told his student to beat him in front of everyone if he spilled even a drop of milk.
Ofcourse the young man managed to walk without spilling a drop of milk and returned to the sheikh.
Sheikh asked : How many girls did u see on your way ??
The young man replied: I didn’t see anyone around me as my concentration was only on the glass of milk because i was scared of getting beaten up in front of everyone if i spill milk.
Sheikh Replied: The same is the case with a true Momin/Muslim.
The true believer is afraid of ALLAH and shame on the day of resurrection if he commits a sin …
These believers protect themselves from committing sin as they are always FOCUSED ON THE DAY OF JUDGEMENT !!
ALLAH says In the Holy Quran:
Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts). That is purer for them. Verily, ALLAH is all-aware of what they do.
Al Quran : Surah AL-Noor Verse No. 30.
May Allah protect us from looking at haram things…Ameen…!
This young man asked Sheik : I feel guilty about myself for a bad habit i am unable to get rid off !
I can’t stop myself from looking at girls in the market, what should I do?
Sheikh gave him a glass full of milk which was filled upto its edges and asked one of his student to accompany him to the market.
He told his student to beat him in front of everyone if he spilled even a drop of milk.
Ofcourse the young man managed to walk without spilling a drop of milk and returned to the sheikh.
Sheikh asked : How many girls did u see on your way ??
The young man replied: I didn’t see anyone around me as my concentration was only on the glass of milk because i was scared of getting beaten up in front of everyone if i spill milk.
Sheikh Replied: The same is the case with a true Momin/Muslim.
The true believer is afraid of ALLAH and shame on the day of resurrection if he commits a sin …
These believers protect themselves from committing sin as they are always FOCUSED ON THE DAY OF JUDGEMENT !!
ALLAH says In the Holy Quran:
Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts). That is purer for them. Verily, ALLAH is all-aware of what they do.
Al Quran : Surah AL-Noor Verse No. 30.
May Allah protect us from looking at haram things…Ameen…!
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Quitting Porn and Masturbation
Two things can not remain simultaneously with a muslim; strong eemaan (faith) and addiction to sin. Some sins are so detrimental to eemaan that a muslim does not remain a muslim while in the state of committing the act. So the faith of a muslim while he is committing zina (fornication/Adultery) or stealing for instance leaves him and hovers above him like a cloud and only returns to him after he stops the act! Imagine if he died in that state!
So, does the one who watches porn realise the urgent need to quit the filthy act? Does he not think that Allaah is oft-forgiving (forgetting He is also severe in purnishment)? Does he even fear he could die in that state? What a disgraceful end that would be!
Untill a muslim realises the need to maintain a strong eemaan he would continue to find sins fair seeming! While the one with a strong eemaan feels saddened and remorseful when he falls into sin and hastens to repentance, the one with a weak faith finds excuses to justify his sins and delays repentance!
What follows are just suggestions which are hoped will help the one who genuinely wishes to quit porn addiction (and masturbation) by Allaah's will.
1. Some need therapy.
Some porn addicts need professional counsel and monitoring. They may have lost the self control and discipline to stop on their own. Such are those whom if they find internet access (or any other source) and privacy, there is a 95% certainty they will view pornographic material! Such need medical help or the help and guide of a scholar with experience in dealing with such .
2. Eliminate all links and triggers.
Links are people, things, places and actions that increases your tendency to watch porn. It is important to mention here the need to keep the company of the pious; people who remind you of Allaah and what is good, rather than those who make fitnah and haraam seem attractive and call you to it. If you are trying to quit porn addiction, you have to quit bad company!
Triggers are things that may cause you to relapse back to watching porn after having tried to quit. Chief among triggers are movies with sex scenes and nude displays. They may also include erotic novels and magazines, sex chats, free mixing with opposite sex, keeping girlfriends - anything that is likely to incite your urge and cause you to seek for a way to satisfy the urge unlawfully!
3. Get Married at the earliest convenient time.
There is nothing more beautiful than being able to satisfy your urge in a halal manner! Once, the prophet peace be upon him informed the companions saying "it is considered charity for a man to have sexual relations with his wife"! The companions were stunned beyond words! So they asked if a man gets rewarded while he satisfies his urge (through intercourse with his wife)? And the prophet peace be upon him replied "أرأيتم لو وضعها في حرام أكان عليه فيها وزر ؟ فكذلك إذا وضعها في الحلال كان له أجر "
"Do you think if he had satisfied his urge by unlawful means he wouldn't have had a sin for it, such it is that if he satisfies it by lawful means, he gets a reward!"
Allaahu akbar! It's a win win for the married man! He satisfies his urge and he gets a reward, but the unmarried one who resorts to porn and masturbation gets a sin instead and may be disgraced if he doesn't stop. May Allaah make marriage easy for those who need it.
Two things can not remain simultaneously with a muslim; strong eemaan (faith) and addiction to sin. Some sins are so detrimental to eemaan that a muslim does not remain a muslim while in the state of committing the act. So the faith of a muslim while he is committing zina (fornication/Adultery) or stealing for instance leaves him and hovers above him like a cloud and only returns to him after he stops the act! Imagine if he died in that state!
So, does the one who watches porn realise the urgent need to quit the filthy act? Does he not think that Allaah is oft-forgiving (forgetting He is also severe in purnishment)? Does he even fear he could die in that state? What a disgraceful end that would be!
Untill a muslim realises the need to maintain a strong eemaan he would continue to find sins fair seeming! While the one with a strong eemaan feels saddened and remorseful when he falls into sin and hastens to repentance, the one with a weak faith finds excuses to justify his sins and delays repentance!
What follows are just suggestions which are hoped will help the one who genuinely wishes to quit porn addiction (and masturbation) by Allaah's will.
1. Some need therapy.
Some porn addicts need professional counsel and monitoring. They may have lost the self control and discipline to stop on their own. Such are those whom if they find internet access (or any other source) and privacy, there is a 95% certainty they will view pornographic material! Such need medical help or the help and guide of a scholar with experience in dealing with such .
2. Eliminate all links and triggers.
Links are people, things, places and actions that increases your tendency to watch porn. It is important to mention here the need to keep the company of the pious; people who remind you of Allaah and what is good, rather than those who make fitnah and haraam seem attractive and call you to it. If you are trying to quit porn addiction, you have to quit bad company!
Triggers are things that may cause you to relapse back to watching porn after having tried to quit. Chief among triggers are movies with sex scenes and nude displays. They may also include erotic novels and magazines, sex chats, free mixing with opposite sex, keeping girlfriends - anything that is likely to incite your urge and cause you to seek for a way to satisfy the urge unlawfully!
3. Get Married at the earliest convenient time.
There is nothing more beautiful than being able to satisfy your urge in a halal manner! Once, the prophet peace be upon him informed the companions saying "it is considered charity for a man to have sexual relations with his wife"! The companions were stunned beyond words! So they asked if a man gets rewarded while he satisfies his urge (through intercourse with his wife)? And the prophet peace be upon him replied "أرأيتم لو وضعها في حرام أكان عليه فيها وزر ؟ فكذلك إذا وضعها في الحلال كان له أجر "
"Do you think if he had satisfied his urge by unlawful means he wouldn't have had a sin for it, such it is that if he satisfies it by lawful means, he gets a reward!"
Allaahu akbar! It's a win win for the married man! He satisfies his urge and he gets a reward, but the unmarried one who resorts to porn and masturbation gets a sin instead and may be disgraced if he doesn't stop. May Allaah make marriage easy for those who need it.
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30 Timeless Lessons I Wish I Knew Before Marriage
If I could sit down with my 20-year-old self, these are the lessons I would share.
1. Don't spend your life looking for the right spouse. Spend it becoming the right spouse.
2. The quality of your marriage will never consistently exceed the quality of your character.
3. Know your values before you commit your life to someone else's.
4. Have a clear vision for your life before asking someone to share it with you.
5. Shared purpose creates stronger marriages than shared interests.
6. Become someone who genuinely adds value to another person's life.
7. Ask yourself, "Why would someone be better off marrying me?"
8. The greatest gift you can give your future spouse is becoming the best version of yourself.
9. Heal your wounds before they become someone else's burden.
10. Marriage doesn't solve your problems; it reveals them.
11. Emotional intelligence will take your marriage further than chemistry ever will.
12. Learn to regulate your emotions before asking someone else to live with them.
13. Choose someone whose values align with yours, not just your emotions.
14. Character attracts respect; values sustain love.
15. Lower your gaze, and Allah will raise your insight.
16. Guard your eyes, and Allah will guard your heart.
17. A disciplined gaze leads to a discerning heart.
18. Purify your heart before searching for someone to love.
19. The heart you take into marriage is the marriage you will build.
20. Don't neglect your relationship with Allah while searching for a relationship with His creation.
21. Learn to communicate with honesty, wisdom, and respect.
22. Listen to understand, not simply to reply.
23. Conflict is inevitable; disrespect is a choice.
24. Trust is built in small moments and broken in small moments.
25. Protect your heart from pride, ego, and arrogance.
26. Choose humility over being right.
27. Your daily habits become the culture of your future home.
28. Serve each other more than you seek to be served.
29. Build your relationship on taqwa, because everything else will be tested.
30. Prepare for the marriage, not just the wedding.
If I could sit down with my 20-year-old self, these are the lessons I would share.
1. Don't spend your life looking for the right spouse. Spend it becoming the right spouse.
2. The quality of your marriage will never consistently exceed the quality of your character.
3. Know your values before you commit your life to someone else's.
4. Have a clear vision for your life before asking someone to share it with you.
5. Shared purpose creates stronger marriages than shared interests.
6. Become someone who genuinely adds value to another person's life.
7. Ask yourself, "Why would someone be better off marrying me?"
8. The greatest gift you can give your future spouse is becoming the best version of yourself.
9. Heal your wounds before they become someone else's burden.
10. Marriage doesn't solve your problems; it reveals them.
11. Emotional intelligence will take your marriage further than chemistry ever will.
12. Learn to regulate your emotions before asking someone else to live with them.
13. Choose someone whose values align with yours, not just your emotions.
14. Character attracts respect; values sustain love.
15. Lower your gaze, and Allah will raise your insight.
16. Guard your eyes, and Allah will guard your heart.
17. A disciplined gaze leads to a discerning heart.
18. Purify your heart before searching for someone to love.
19. The heart you take into marriage is the marriage you will build.
20. Don't neglect your relationship with Allah while searching for a relationship with His creation.
21. Learn to communicate with honesty, wisdom, and respect.
22. Listen to understand, not simply to reply.
23. Conflict is inevitable; disrespect is a choice.
24. Trust is built in small moments and broken in small moments.
25. Protect your heart from pride, ego, and arrogance.
26. Choose humility over being right.
27. Your daily habits become the culture of your future home.
28. Serve each other more than you seek to be served.
29. Build your relationship on taqwa, because everything else will be tested.
30. Prepare for the marriage, not just the wedding.
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Some people online writing about marriage from a pessimistic perspective hinting at their own experiences even if not stated, know exactly what they did to end up where they are. They just wouldn't mention that for obvious reasons.
Some men that talk about loss of respect from wives know precisely what they did to lose that respect they once had.
Some women that talk about how men change for the worse over time in marriage carefully leave out how unbearable they have become to their husbands.
Some men that talk about how wives become difficult when they become rich deliberately stay silent about how oppressive they were when they ran the show while she had nothing.
Some women that speak bitterly about their divorce and how marriage is a boomerang waiting to happen conveniently leave out the persistent recalcitrant behaviour that was their stock in trade while married till their husband just couldn't take any more of it and let them go.
This is why I am typically indifferent to marital advice that comes from a place of trauma. It is not in my place to judge whether you are truly the victim or just playing the victim. I just know that advice from a fresh or an ongoing traumatic experience is hardly reliable even if you are the victim. This is because of the abundance of emotions that trail it. Ideally, you should heal from it and at least be sincere about your role in what you get if any, before admonishing others.
We need more people with a healthy perspective of marriage talking about marriage. Marital advice shouldn't be a consolation for all that is wrong with your marriage. If you are troubled in or by your marriage, you should be getting advised not giving one.
If you have made up your mind that all men or women are bad, why not step aside and allow others who are still positive about humanity to live in peace? Why strive so hard to drag everyone down your abyss of darkness?
Abu Imrān
Some men that talk about loss of respect from wives know precisely what they did to lose that respect they once had.
Some women that talk about how men change for the worse over time in marriage carefully leave out how unbearable they have become to their husbands.
Some men that talk about how wives become difficult when they become rich deliberately stay silent about how oppressive they were when they ran the show while she had nothing.
Some women that speak bitterly about their divorce and how marriage is a boomerang waiting to happen conveniently leave out the persistent recalcitrant behaviour that was their stock in trade while married till their husband just couldn't take any more of it and let them go.
This is why I am typically indifferent to marital advice that comes from a place of trauma. It is not in my place to judge whether you are truly the victim or just playing the victim. I just know that advice from a fresh or an ongoing traumatic experience is hardly reliable even if you are the victim. This is because of the abundance of emotions that trail it. Ideally, you should heal from it and at least be sincere about your role in what you get if any, before admonishing others.
We need more people with a healthy perspective of marriage talking about marriage. Marital advice shouldn't be a consolation for all that is wrong with your marriage. If you are troubled in or by your marriage, you should be getting advised not giving one.
If you have made up your mind that all men or women are bad, why not step aside and allow others who are still positive about humanity to live in peace? Why strive so hard to drag everyone down your abyss of darkness?
Abu Imrān
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Muslim Marriage Tips
Photo
Nikah is the most easiest Sunnah to follow......
Just do :;
--Nikah in masjid,
--A small Walima with close relatives and dear ones at home.
Perform Hajj/Umrah.
Buy things that you both need/want instead of wasting on Gair Sunnah wedding.
Trust me no one cares about your 18d buffet,tulips and tuxedo.
At most muslim wedding the only Halal thing is the meat.
Stop wasting money on expensive marriage halls,unnecessary decorations,filled with music,free-mixing and no haya,wasting food and show off.
Stop trying to please the creation instead of Allah.
If you begin marriage with Haram,don't expect "Barakah".
Nikah is easy,you only need :
--The bride
--The groom
--The wali of the bride
--2 Males witnesses.
That's it....!!!!!
And it is not compulsory that you start living together of the first day.The man can still keep hustling to afford a home.The girl can still keep living with her parents.
Stop over complicating marriages.
This is the reason why youth is inclined to haram.
You don't need to finish your degree to marry.
Do everything side by side.However I won't be extreme at the same time,there are exceptions,of course...
I.e financial barriers.
But if Allah has given you the bare minimum essentials to marry,with a potential match with a righteous man/woman.
Early marriage fulfill your loneliness,it helps you in emotional and physical needs.
Share it for sadqa e jariya🌹
Just do :;
--Nikah in masjid,
--A small Walima with close relatives and dear ones at home.
Perform Hajj/Umrah.
Buy things that you both need/want instead of wasting on Gair Sunnah wedding.
Trust me no one cares about your 18d buffet,tulips and tuxedo.
At most muslim wedding the only Halal thing is the meat.
Stop wasting money on expensive marriage halls,unnecessary decorations,filled with music,free-mixing and no haya,wasting food and show off.
Stop trying to please the creation instead of Allah.
If you begin marriage with Haram,don't expect "Barakah".
Nikah is easy,you only need :
--The bride
--The groom
--The wali of the bride
--2 Males witnesses.
That's it....!!!!!
And it is not compulsory that you start living together of the first day.The man can still keep hustling to afford a home.The girl can still keep living with her parents.
Stop over complicating marriages.
This is the reason why youth is inclined to haram.
You don't need to finish your degree to marry.
Do everything side by side.However I won't be extreme at the same time,there are exceptions,of course...
I.e financial barriers.
But if Allah has given you the bare minimum essentials to marry,with a potential match with a righteous man/woman.
Early marriage fulfill your loneliness,it helps you in emotional and physical needs.
Share it for sadqa e jariya🌹
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Is the Wife Required to Furnish the Marital Home?
The scholars differed regarding who is responsible for furnishing the marital home. The Mālikī school held one view, while the majority of jurists held another.
The Mālikī Opinion
The Mālikī school held that if the wife has received the immediate portion of her mahr before consummation of the marriage, she should furnish the marital home up to the amount she received, according to local custom. If she has not received any of the mahr, she is not required to furnish anything unless this was stipulated in the marriage contract or established by local custom.
The Majority Opinion
The majority of Islamic jurists held that the husband is responsible for furnishing the marital home. Providing furniture, bedding, and household necessities is part of the financial maintenance (nafaqah) that he owes his wife.
Allah says:
"Men are caretakers of women because Allah has given some of them more responsibility than others and because they spend from their wealth." (Qur'an 4:34)
The Kuwaiti Encyclopedia of Islamic Jurisprudence states:
"The majority of jurists hold that a woman is not required to furnish the marital home from her dowry or any part of it. Rather, the husband must prepare the home with everything necessary for it to be a proper residence for both spouses."
The Mahr Is the Wife's Exclusive Right
The Ḥanafīs, Shāfiʿīs, and the apparent position of the Ḥanbalīs held that the wife cannot be compelled to furnish the home. The mahr is her exclusive property, and there is no text in the Qur'an or Sunnah obligating her—or her family—to purchase household furnishings. If they contribute, it is a voluntary gift, not a legal obligation.
Evidence from the Sunnah
When ʿAlī (رضي الله عنه) gave Fāṭimah's mahr, the Prophet ﷺ instructed that household items and clothing be purchased for her, including a bed and a leather pillow stuffed with palm fiber (Ibn Ḥibbān). There is also no authentic evidence that the wives of the Prophet ﷺ or the Companions were required to furnish the marital home. If any family provided furnishings, it was considered a voluntary gift, not a legal obligation.
The scholars differed regarding who is responsible for furnishing the marital home. The Mālikī school held one view, while the majority of jurists held another.
The Mālikī Opinion
The Mālikī school held that if the wife has received the immediate portion of her mahr before consummation of the marriage, she should furnish the marital home up to the amount she received, according to local custom. If she has not received any of the mahr, she is not required to furnish anything unless this was stipulated in the marriage contract or established by local custom.
The Majority Opinion
The majority of Islamic jurists held that the husband is responsible for furnishing the marital home. Providing furniture, bedding, and household necessities is part of the financial maintenance (nafaqah) that he owes his wife.
Allah says:
"Men are caretakers of women because Allah has given some of them more responsibility than others and because they spend from their wealth." (Qur'an 4:34)
The Kuwaiti Encyclopedia of Islamic Jurisprudence states:
"The majority of jurists hold that a woman is not required to furnish the marital home from her dowry or any part of it. Rather, the husband must prepare the home with everything necessary for it to be a proper residence for both spouses."
The Mahr Is the Wife's Exclusive Right
The Ḥanafīs, Shāfiʿīs, and the apparent position of the Ḥanbalīs held that the wife cannot be compelled to furnish the home. The mahr is her exclusive property, and there is no text in the Qur'an or Sunnah obligating her—or her family—to purchase household furnishings. If they contribute, it is a voluntary gift, not a legal obligation.
Evidence from the Sunnah
When ʿAlī (رضي الله عنه) gave Fāṭimah's mahr, the Prophet ﷺ instructed that household items and clothing be purchased for her, including a bed and a leather pillow stuffed with palm fiber (Ibn Ḥibbān). There is also no authentic evidence that the wives of the Prophet ﷺ or the Companions were required to furnish the marital home. If any family provided furnishings, it was considered a voluntary gift, not a legal obligation.
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Men, especially married men or those preparing for marriage, need to understand this, you cannot remain ignorant and careless about learning the correct religion, then expect your wife to change according to your personal standards or push her into extremism.
If you genuinely want to guide someone, begin by correcting yourself. Learn the Qur’an and Sunnah properly, practice it and let your advice be grounded in them, not in personal opinions, culture or unnecessary harshness.
Be gentle with your words. Be wise in your guidance.
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“Treat women kindly, for woman was created from a rib. The most curved portion of the rib is its upper portion. If you try to straighten it, you will break it; and if you leave it, it will remain crooked. So treat women kindly.”
(Sahih al-Bukhari 3331 || Sahih Muslim 1468a.)
So don't try to force your wife into becoming the person you have imagined in your head. Advise her with knowledge, patience and wisdom. Correct what genuinely needs correcting according to the Qur’an and Sunnah, but do not turn your personal preferences into religion.
Guide with knowledge. Advise with wisdom. Correct with kindness. And before trying to guide others, make sure YOU are walking the path yourself.
If you genuinely want to guide someone, begin by correcting yourself. Learn the Qur’an and Sunnah properly, practice it and let your advice be grounded in them, not in personal opinions, culture or unnecessary harshness.
Be gentle with your words. Be wise in your guidance.
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“Treat women kindly, for woman was created from a rib. The most curved portion of the rib is its upper portion. If you try to straighten it, you will break it; and if you leave it, it will remain crooked. So treat women kindly.”
(Sahih al-Bukhari 3331 || Sahih Muslim 1468a.)
So don't try to force your wife into becoming the person you have imagined in your head. Advise her with knowledge, patience and wisdom. Correct what genuinely needs correcting according to the Qur’an and Sunnah, but do not turn your personal preferences into religion.
Guide with knowledge. Advise with wisdom. Correct with kindness. And before trying to guide others, make sure YOU are walking the path yourself.
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DIFFERENTIATE BETWEEN A MATURE AND IMMATURE WIFE:
Immature wife:
- Argues just to win and prove she’s right
- Shuts down or gets defensive when corrected
- Treats marriage like a competition with her husband
- Constantly needs attention and validation
- Uses emotions as a way to control situations
- Takes almost everything personally and gets offended fast
- Rarely admits she’s wrong
- Almost never apologises
Mature wife:
- Talks things through to restore peace
- Owns her part without making it a big drama
- Cheers on her husband’s growth and supports him
- Puts real emotional connection first
- Shares how she feels clearly and calmly
- Tries to understand before reacting
- Receives correction without ego
- Apologises when she’s in the wrong
A mature woman makes marriage feel lighter and more peaceful.
Immature wife:
- Argues just to win and prove she’s right
- Shuts down or gets defensive when corrected
- Treats marriage like a competition with her husband
- Constantly needs attention and validation
- Uses emotions as a way to control situations
- Takes almost everything personally and gets offended fast
- Rarely admits she’s wrong
- Almost never apologises
Mature wife:
- Talks things through to restore peace
- Owns her part without making it a big drama
- Cheers on her husband’s growth and supports him
- Puts real emotional connection first
- Shares how she feels clearly and calmly
- Tries to understand before reacting
- Receives correction without ego
- Apologises when she’s in the wrong
A mature woman makes marriage feel lighter and more peaceful.
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Who you marry is more important than when you marry.
You can wait until 35 and still choose the wrong woman.
You can marry at 25 and choose the right one.
Age does not save a bad choice. Timing does not fix a bad character. A peaceful, loyal, respectful woman at 24 is better than a bitter, entitled one at 32.
Don’t rush because of pressure and don’t delay just to delay.
Choose the person well. The year on the calendar will not rescue a wrong marriage.
You can wait until 35 and still choose the wrong woman.
You can marry at 25 and choose the right one.
Age does not save a bad choice. Timing does not fix a bad character. A peaceful, loyal, respectful woman at 24 is better than a bitter, entitled one at 32.
Don’t rush because of pressure and don’t delay just to delay.
Choose the person well. The year on the calendar will not rescue a wrong marriage.
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𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗰𝗮𝗻'𝘁 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝗿𝘂𝗶𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗱𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗼𝘆 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗿𝗲𝗲.
A husband made his wife cry. One day, she looked at him as he lovingly played with their little daughter and softly asked:
“What would you do if one day a man married her... and made her cry?”
Without hesitation, he replied:
“I would kill him. She is my beloved daughter.”
With tears filling her eyes, she quietly said:
“I, too, have a father who loves me.”
────── .✦ ──────
Never forget this.
Before she became your wife, she was someone's precious daughter. She was loved, protected, prayed for, and cherished by her parents. They entrusted her to you, hoping you would honor, protect, and care for her, not become the reason for her tears.
The tears you cause your wife do not stop with her. They reach the hearts of those who raised her with love.
So fear Allah regarding your wives.
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
Treat women kindly.
[متفق عليه]
And he ﷺ also said:
The best of you are those who are best to their wives, and I am the best of you to my wives.
[جامع الترمذي (٣٨٩٥)]
A righteous man is not the one who is gentle only with strangers, but the one who is gentle with the woman who shares his home and has placed her trust in him.
Be the reason she thanks Allah for marrying you, not the reason she cries to Allah because of you.
A husband made his wife cry. One day, she looked at him as he lovingly played with their little daughter and softly asked:
“What would you do if one day a man married her... and made her cry?”
Without hesitation, he replied:
“I would kill him. She is my beloved daughter.”
With tears filling her eyes, she quietly said:
“I, too, have a father who loves me.”
────── .✦ ──────
Never forget this.
Before she became your wife, she was someone's precious daughter. She was loved, protected, prayed for, and cherished by her parents. They entrusted her to you, hoping you would honor, protect, and care for her, not become the reason for her tears.
The tears you cause your wife do not stop with her. They reach the hearts of those who raised her with love.
So fear Allah regarding your wives.
The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said:
Treat women kindly.
[متفق عليه]
And he ﷺ also said:
The best of you are those who are best to their wives, and I am the best of you to my wives.
[جامع الترمذي (٣٨٩٥)]
A righteous man is not the one who is gentle only with strangers, but the one who is gentle with the woman who shares his home and has placed her trust in him.
Be the reason she thanks Allah for marrying you, not the reason she cries to Allah because of you.
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Abu Hurayra reported that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said,
"The person who strives on behalf of the widows and pooris like those who strive in the way of Allah and like those who fast in the day and pray at night."
Al-Adab Al-Mufrad 131
Book 7 Hadith 3
Graded Sahih by Al-Albani
"The person who strives on behalf of the widows and pooris like those who strive in the way of Allah and like those who fast in the day and pray at night."
Al-Adab Al-Mufrad 131
Book 7 Hadith 3
Graded Sahih by Al-Albani
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Women’s bodies have about 52% lesser serotonin as compared to men—so she’s more likely to develop emotional disorders. But the size of the heart of a man is bigger in both impact and magnitude than a woman. Which means when he’s heart broken, he’s going to suffer in more greatly with deeper magnitude. However, the masculine nervous system handles heartbreaks, life problems, trauma and issues very differently than a woman.
The way you’ll navigate the world after a heartbreak will be very different, very different from her. Yet, many people assume they’re on similar journeys. In a sense, both are in pain, sure; but in a very different method; thus, two different healing journeys are required. I can help you both.
A woman is born with a very finite number of eggs. . Generally, women don’t look at men unnecessarily when she’s regulated and healthy. If there are a bunch of girls in the mall or in the shop, she’s going to look everywhere other than at men. This is behavior is in sync with a limited supply of eggs: she’ll ignore almost all men.
The men however produce millions of sperms per day; so sex isn’t the primary bonding tool for men. However, sex is far more serious for women in attachment because the body reorganizes the chemical makeup in certainty each time she’s intimate—marking the person as a singular mate for life.
Men marry and bond based on emotional support, respect, reassurance and appreciation. So the heartbreak for a man is very different, because his loyalty actually was based on more emotional love than the woman herself. This is not applicable to all men as the emotional dimension is too complex and vast to be objectively put in one sentence.
What she’ll go through and what you’ll go through will be very different. In the last 10 years of my mentoring I’ve helped several people who’ve been heart broken, helped repair broken marriages, prevent divorces and have helped people who have been traumatized after a relationship ended.
If you’re in a painful situation and you know you can’t live like this anymore, you can enter my qualification system in which a gift mentoring session can be given; message me: “heart repair.”
The way you’ll navigate the world after a heartbreak will be very different, very different from her. Yet, many people assume they’re on similar journeys. In a sense, both are in pain, sure; but in a very different method; thus, two different healing journeys are required. I can help you both.
A woman is born with a very finite number of eggs. . Generally, women don’t look at men unnecessarily when she’s regulated and healthy. If there are a bunch of girls in the mall or in the shop, she’s going to look everywhere other than at men. This is behavior is in sync with a limited supply of eggs: she’ll ignore almost all men.
The men however produce millions of sperms per day; so sex isn’t the primary bonding tool for men. However, sex is far more serious for women in attachment because the body reorganizes the chemical makeup in certainty each time she’s intimate—marking the person as a singular mate for life.
Men marry and bond based on emotional support, respect, reassurance and appreciation. So the heartbreak for a man is very different, because his loyalty actually was based on more emotional love than the woman herself. This is not applicable to all men as the emotional dimension is too complex and vast to be objectively put in one sentence.
What she’ll go through and what you’ll go through will be very different. In the last 10 years of my mentoring I’ve helped several people who’ve been heart broken, helped repair broken marriages, prevent divorces and have helped people who have been traumatized after a relationship ended.
If you’re in a painful situation and you know you can’t live like this anymore, you can enter my qualification system in which a gift mentoring session can be given; message me: “heart repair.”
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Abu Hurayra reported that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said,
"The person who strives on behalf of the widows and pooris like those who strive in the way of Allah and like those who fast in the day and pray at night."
Al-Adab Al-Mufrad 131
Book 7 Hadith 3
Graded Sahih by Al-Albani
"The person who strives on behalf of the widows and pooris like those who strive in the way of Allah and like those who fast in the day and pray at night."
Al-Adab Al-Mufrad 131
Book 7 Hadith 3
Graded Sahih by Al-Albani
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lbn Taymiyyah رحمه الله said:
"Some women posses greater wisdom, intelligence understanding than many men."
📚(Majmu al Fatawa 6/447)
"Some women posses greater wisdom, intelligence understanding than many men."
📚(Majmu al Fatawa 6/447)
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